Why reciprocity in friendship feels so elusive?​

My husband and I have been grappling with a tough question: Why is reciprocity in friendships so challenging? After years of therapy, I’ve stepped back from relationships where I was the one always giving—listening, accompanying, and organizing. Meanwhile, my husband realized he’s usually the one initiating plans, hosting, and reaching out. Both in our 40s, child-free, and surrounded by fellow child-free friends, we’re exhausted by the constant analysis of our friendships. We feel like we’re putting in too much effort just to maintain them. I refuse to engage in unhealthy dynamics anymore, and my husband now regrets not noticing earlier—it made him feel worse about himself. Is this a sign of increased self-centeredness in society? Bad luck? Or a pattern we need to break? My husband tends to chase those less interested in him (a step forward), but I don’t. We’re still puzzled—what are we doing wrong? #FriendshipDynamics #ReciprocityInFriendships #MentalHealth #SelfReflection #RelationshipAdvice