My Mom Thinks Instant Coffee Is Artisanal

Remember when you swapped out Mom’s $18 coffee for a $4 jar of instant? And she loved it? Said it was “bright, balanced, with a smooth finish”? You almost died right there at the breakfast table. She was recovering, you were broke, and both of you were pretending things were okay. She canceled her yoga app, stopped impulse-buying candles—but the one thing she clung to? “Good coffee.” So you lied. You called it a “micro-lot Indonesian roast,” printed a fake label, and watched her fall in love with powdered beans from aisle 4. She tells everyone about her new favorite brand. You feel kinda evil. But she’s happy. And she hasn’t spent a dime on overpriced beans in two months. So maybe it’s not a lie. Maybe it’s love. Or maybe you’re just the cheapest barista alive. Either way… don’t forget to “restock.” – Me, 2AM, with guilt and a spoonful of “Java Bloom.” #NoFilter #MomHacks #BudgetLife #FamilyDrama #TinyLiesBigLove #AdultingFail #FrugalConfessions #MorningRituals