My cat hired me as his personal assistant

Three months ago, Muffins decided he was management material. It started small—sitting on my laptop during important Zoom calls, strategically placing himself between me and the coffee maker until I acknowledged his presence. Now? I'm basically his full-time employee. My daily tasks include: opening doors he could easily push open himself, warming up seventeen different spots on the couch until he finds the perfect one, and serving meals at precisely 6:47 AM (not 6:45, not 6:50—he has standards). The weird part? My productivity has never been higher. Turns out having a furry supervisor who judges your life choices with a single slow blink is surprisingly motivating. Plus, the benefits are great—unlimited purrs, occasional head bonuses, and a boss who naps 16 hours a day. Still haven't figured out how to put 'Cat Assistant' on my LinkedIn, but honestly? Best job I've ever had. #CatBoss #PetParent #CatsOfInternet #Pets #Cats