My Cat Has Officially Conquered My Entire Life

So apparently I don't live in MY apartment anymore. I'm just the staff. It started innocent enough - Luna would sit on my laptop during work calls. Now she's got her own Zoom background and somehow gets more screen time than me. My coworkers ask about HER before asking how I'm doing. She's claimed the expensive gaming chair I saved months for. I'm typing this from a folding chair while she sprawls across HER throne, judging my life choices. The final straw? I caught myself asking HER permission to use the bathroom. She gave me a slow blink. I took that as a yes. My dating profile now leads with 'Luna's human seeks someone worthy of her approval.' She's rejected three potential partners by strategically hairballing on their shoes. I've accepted my fate. This house has a new CEO, and she's fluffy, demanding, and apparently better at running my life than I am. #Pets #Cats #CatParent