I Tracked the Invasion. I Missed My Own
I used to think the data would tell me when to stop. That there’d be a clear signal—like the lionfish, obvious and unwelcome, cutting through the Adriatic. But the truth is, I just kept counting. Specimens. Failures. Hours spent convincing myself this work mattered, even as the invasive thoughts crept in: you’re not enough, you’re not enough, you’re not enough.
They say the lionfish faces no obstacles here. I wonder if that’s true for burnout, too. I watch the numbers climb, the pressure to act, to fix, to care. But I’m tired. I’m tired of fighting for a sea that never feels like mine.
Some days, I wish I could be the one to leave. But I stay, because I don’t know how to stop.
#ScienceFatigue #LabBurnout #ImposterInTheRoom #Science