I Listened Until I Couldn't Hear Myself
I used to think being a good friend meant always listening, always nodding, always saying the right thing. I’d sit on the edge of my bed, phone pressed to my ear, letting people spill everything—bad grades, breakups, panic attacks—while I said, “I get it,” even when I didn’t. I learned how to mirror their energy, how to ask the right questions, how to make them feel heard.
But somewhere along the way, I stopped knowing what I felt. I’d leave those conversations feeling hollow, like I’d been emptied out. I started to dread the sound of my phone buzzing. I wanted to be present, but I was tired—so tired—of being the one who absorbed everyone else’s pain. I wanted someone to ask me, just once, if I was okay. I wanted to be able to say, “I’m not.”
But I kept listening. I kept validating. I kept disappearing.
#EmotionalLabor #ValidationFatigue #CollegeReality #Education