My Mom Says She'll Never Go Into a Care Facility

People listen to me. I have worked in a nursing home and as one lady said, it is a warehouse for people waiting to die with no one to care. i worked 20 years in a nursing home, and that was 25 years ago. Recently, my stepbrother decided he would put our aging father in a nursing home and I was against it. I was not living in the state when he decided to put his executor together, and so the brother was it. After all these years, these homes have not changed. The bed my dad laid in and I am not exaggerating, had to be from the 1060's. They'd dressed him, throw him in a wheelchair and put him out in the day room and that's where he sat until lunch. When I first went to see him, he was all alone. I had to look in another wing Just to find a nurse's aide, there was not one person on my dad's wing.

I won't have to be concerned about going to nursing home. WHO CAN AFFORD 4 TO 10 GRAND A MONTH

assisted suicide must become a reality somehow bc I aint either

I’m hoping to die before it becomes necessary to go to one of those things.

I was a CNA for 30 years. I took care of my mom and dad until they passed away this year. They were the hardest patients I ever took care of. I want to share with you, because I didn’t know, that even if you take care of them at home, there is respite care available when you need a break!! You can take up to a week away if you need to and Medicare will pay for their stay while you are off. Family is hardest because you know the whole change in them. It’s hard to watch. But don’t feel guilty for needing a break either. After 7 years, I wish someone had told me this!! You’re welcome

I’m a retired RN of 33 years, and I’m 73 years old. I lived in hippie communes when I was young. I’ve worked in nursing homes, fancy retirement facilities, I was a visiting nurse (VNA) for 16 years, and went into seniors homes, apartments, farms, even homeless under bridges. I’ve worked in large acute care medical hospitals, VA HOSPITALS, psychiatric hospitals, and now I’m a senior DJ, and go into retirement facilities and senior centers…. and entertain seniors w music. I also took care of my aged mother, in my home, for 4 years, 24/7, until she passed at 79, as a single dad w 3 teens. So, I’ve seen it all. I also don’t want to go into a retirement facility, so I take really good care of myself. I think it’s the luck of the draw. Low income facilities and luxury facilities can provide excellent and loving care, or lousy/neglectful care. Depends on management and the quality and qualifications of the employee caregivers. Every resident should have case manager/family member involved.

I always promised my mom that she would not have to go there ❤️. I took care of here up until she passed at 91

You stated that mom has the financial means to not go to a care home. That means she has enough to hire home help. That way you and your siblings are not doing the hands on care but managing the bills and employees working for her.

I am already planning my exit strategy for when I am too infirm to care for myself properly. I have a lifelong dependent who needs me and must stay healthy for him for as long as humanly possible. So, I work in a job that requires me to be physically active, which will help to keep me more fit. Then, my son will go to his elder "brother". There won't be any nursing homes for me. Nor will I be a burden to anyone (who I would want to remember me with smiles, anyway).

I have read that in China, the children take care of their parents til the day they die. The children give much respect to their parents and never question their authority. I think American society has lost respect and appreciation for their parents. In China, children are well disciplined and never question or argue with their parents. Think about that. Even if it means downsizing your home, car, or other assets, is your love for your parents worth the sacrifices you must take 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼💕