How I Survived Catching My Ninja Cat
Ever tried to catch a cat that’s just not having it? I did, and let’s just say, I now have a new respect for wild animal handlers. My fluffy overlord transforms into a parkour champion the second she senses the carrier. Forget calling her—she’ll stare at me like I’m the villain in her telenovela.
Pro tip: Don’t make eye contact. Sit quietly, pretend you don’t care, and suddenly you’re irresistible. If that fails, bribe her with tuna (the stinkier, the better). Still no luck? Blanket burrito time. Just toss it over her, scoop her up, and pray she doesn’t activate her murder mittens.
For strays, I learned the hard way: set out food for a few days, then use a humane trap. Gloves and long sleeves are non-negotiable. And always, always have a towel handy.
Honestly, catching a cat is 30% skill, 70% luck, and 100% humility. Good luck, fellow cat-wranglers. You’ll need it.
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