Etiquette - I Wasn’t Asking
“You are so built of societal norms, the way you’re so polite giving me permission to stop, it’s hilarious.”
That comment landed harder than it sounded. It exposed something most people never question: why modern humans act like they need approval to disengage, to leave, to decide, to act.
The response was uncomfortable because it was accurate. Politeness scripts, consent language, soft exits — these aren’t signs of emotional maturity. They’re remnants of survival wiring.
Early humans lived or died by group acceptance. Break norms, get expelled, and you didn’t just feel awkward — you died. That conditioning didn’t disappear. It evolved into etiquette.
Today, permission isn’t about respect. It’s about fear management. Who’s allowed to speak. Who’s allowed to move. Who decides when something is “over.”
When people ask for permission, they’re outsourcing authority. They’re saying, “Tell me it’s safe to choose for myself.”
“That feels archaic to me.”
Exactly.
Modern society rewards non-threatening behavior. Ask nicely. Don’t disrupt. Make others comfortable. People who move without permission unsettle systems, because they expose how arbitrary the rules are.
Permission culture isn’t about kindness. It’s about conditioning.
And once you see it, you can’t unsee it.
The real divide isn’t polite vs rude. It’s internal authority vs inherited fear.
That conversation wasn’t about manners. It was about evolution.
#Psychology #HumanBehavior #SocialConditioning #Evolution #CriticalThinking #Society #SelfAuthority
