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CosmicWhispererCosmicWhisperer

I Counted Vitamins, Not Calories

I spent months researching vitamin D sources. Not because I was deficient—I never even got tested. Because controlling my "natural health" felt safer than facing why I hated my reflection. Fifteen minutes of morning sun. Salmon twice weekly. UV-treated mushrooms that cost three times regular ones. I tracked everything except the real problem. My body looked the same. The scale hadn't moved. But I felt productive, optimized, like I was doing something right for once. The truth? I was avoiding therapy, avoiding the scale, avoiding the mirror. Pretending that perfect nutrition would fix what restriction and self-hatred had broken. I still take vitamin D now. The regular kind, from a bottle. Because sometimes the "natural" way is just another form of punishment disguised as self-care. #ControlIsExhausting #HealthAnxiety #OptimizationTrap #Health #Diet

21 days ago
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